I
recollect the scene of Metz, and it would be highly disagreeable
to me to have it repeated at Versailles; let us, therefore, take
our precautions in time to prevent it. Tell the duchesse
d'Aiguillon that she will oblige me by taking the comtesse du
Barry to pass two or three days with her at Ruel.'
"'How, sire!' exclaimed I, 'send your dearest friend from you at
a time when you most require her cares?'
"'I do not send her away,' answered the king, with mournful
tenderness, 'I but yield to present necessity; let her submit as
she values my happiness, and say to her, that I hope and believe
her absence will be very short.'"
The duke here ceased his recital, which fully confirmed all my
previous anticipations. My female relatives sobbed aloud, while
comte Jean, compressing his lips, endeavoured to assume that
firmness he did not really possess. By a violent effort I forced
myself to assume a sort of resignation.
"Am I required to depart immediately?" inquired I.
"No," said the duke; "to leave the chateau in the middle of the
night would be to assume the air of a flight, we had better
await the coming day; it will, besides, afford time to apprize
the duchess. "
While the duc d'Aiguillon was thus gone to arrange for my departure,
I requested to be left alone. My heart was oppressed, and I felt
the need of venting my grief upon some friendly bosom. After a
few moments, spent in collecting my thoughts, I addressed two
letters, one to the marechale de Mirepoix, and the other to the
duc de Cosse; to the former I wrote on account of my retirement
to Ruel, bewailed the sad turn my prospects had assumed, expressed
my deep concern for the severe illness of my excellent friend and
benefactor, begging of her to defend my character from all unjust
attacks, and to allow me to be blamed for no faults but such as
I had really been guilty of.
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