She had loved me when a simple milliner, and she cherished the
same fond regard for me in my improved situation. Her friendship
has not forsaken me in my reverses; and I feel quite assured that
death only will dissolve the tender friendship which still subsists
between us. As for her brother, he spared me much shame and
confusion by never seeking my presence; a meeting with him would
indeed have overwhelmed me with painful recollections.
And now, my friend, I am about to relate to you an adventure, the
bare mention of which covers my cheek with guilty blushes; fain
would I conceal it from you, but my promise is given to lay my
whole heart before you, and it shall be done, cost what it may.
I know not why it should ever have been permitted you gentlemen
to frame laws, which, while they permit you, in the gratification
of your passions, to descend ever so low in the scale of society
without any disgrace attaching itself to you from the obscure
condition of the object of your search, to us females it is
prohibited, under penalty of incurring the utmost degradation,
to gratify the inclination of our hearts when awakened by one of
more humble rank than our own. A great lord may love a kitchen
maid, a noble duke, like M. de Villeroi, may indulge his fancy
for a waiting-woman, and yet lose no portion of his dignity, or
of the esteem in which the world holds him; but, on the other
hand, woe to the high-born dame who should receive the homage
of an obscure citizen, or the noble countess who should lend a
favourable ear to the sighs of her
; the public
voice would loud and angrily inveigh against so flagrant a breach
of decorum.
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