SEARCH
0-9 A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
Prev | Current Page 43 | Next

Lear, Edward, 1812-1888

"Nonsense Song"


Cut it into the shape of ordinary cutlets, and serve up in a clean
table-cloth or dinner-napkin.

TO MAKE GOSKY PATTIES.
Take a pig three or four years of age, and tie him by the off hind-leg to a
post. Place 5 pounds of currants, 3 of sugar, 2 pecks of peas, 18 roast
chestnuts, a candle, and 6 bushels of turnips, within his reach: if he eats
these, constantly provide him with more.
Then procure some cream, some slices of Cheshire cheese, 4 quires of
foolscap paper, and a packet of black pins. Work the whole into a paste,
and spread it out to dry on a sheet of clean brown waterproof linen.
When the paste is perfectly dry, but not before, proceed to beat the pig
violently with the handle of a large broom. If he squeals, beat him again.
Visit the paste and beat the pig alternately for some days, and ascertain
if, at the end of that period, the whole is about to turn into Gosky
Patties.
If it does not then, it never will; and in that case the pig may be let
loose, and the whole process may be considered as finished.
* * * * *


NONSENSE BOTANY.

[Illustration: Baccopipia Gracilis.]
[Illustration: Bottlephorkia Spoonifolia.]
[Illustration: Cockatooca Superba.]
[Illustration: Fishia Marina.


Pages:
31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55