_Pater_. Sir, you are an insolent young puppy!
_Jacky_. I am forced to contradict you--in justice to yourself. You
cannot be willing to let me regard you as a dog?
_Pater_. (_after a pause_). Well, the sooner you get back to the
school the better.
_Jacky_ (_promptly_). I have no doubt you are right, my dear
Father; and, as I take a sincere interest in your welfare, I would
respectfully suggest that you should accompany me. It must be patent
to us both that you are lacking in polish.
_Pater_. (_losing his patience_). You young cub! I will give you the
soundest thrashing you ever had in your life!
_Materfamilias_ (_interposing_). Oh, you cruel man! What has the poor
child done?
_Jacky_ (_with ready tact_). Nothing, dearest Mamma, except to take
after his kind, clever and accomplished Mother!
[_Scene closes in upon a family group not entirely free from
domestic complications._
* * * * *
THE SURREY ABC.
[Illustration]
A is for ABEL, who can certainly block well;
B stands for BOWLEY, and BEAUMONT, and BROOKWELL;
C is the Captain, JOHN SHUTER his name;
D is the Devotion he gives to the game;
E is the Eleven, deservedly great;
F is the Funk which their bowlers create.
G stands for GEORGE--our only GEORGE LOHMANN;
H for young HENDERSON, valiant young foeman.
I is the Innings, beloved of the gapers;
J is the Jargon they put in the papers.
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