"
"No doubt but you are both, John; yet how came you to go to war, if
you felt so? Wasn't enlisting as bad as marrying?"
"No, ma'am, not as I see it, for one is helping my neighbor, the
other pleasing myself. I went because I couldn't help it. I didn't
want the glory or the pay; I wanted the right thing done, and people
kept saying the men who were in earnest ought to flight. I was in
earnest, the Lord knows! but I held off as long as I could, not
knowing which was my duty; mother saw the case, gave me her ring to
keep me steady, and said 'Go;' so I went."
A short story and a simple one, but the man and the mother were
portrayed better than pages of fine writing could have done it.
"Do you ever regret that you came, when you lie here suffering so
much?"
"Never ma'am; I haven't helped a great deal, but I've shown I was
willing to give my life, and perhaps I've got to; but I don't blame
anybody, and if it was to do over again, I'd do it. I'm a little
sorry I wasn't wounded in front; it looks cowardly to be hit in the
back, but I obeyed orders, and it doesn't matter in the end, I
know."
Poor John! it did not matter now, except that a shot in front might
have spared the long agony in store for him. He seemed to read the
thought that troubled me, as he spoke so hopefully when there was no
hope, for he suddenly added,--
"This is my first battle; do they think it's going to be my last?"
"I'm afraid they do, John.
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