But no outside influence ever could bring home to her the realization of
the shadow on her life as forcibly as did her own inner musings, the
testimony of her own soul. If she had but been innocent, how easy to
bear Jim's scorn, or the scorn of the whole world! It was the bitter
knowledge that she had taken her life in her own hands nearly twenty
years ago, and wrecked it more surely than if she had torn out her own
eyes, that made her heart sick within her now. She, who loved dignity,
who loved purity, who loved strength, must carry to her grave the
knowledge of her own detestable weakness! She must instruct her
daughter, guarding the blue eyes and the active mind from even the
knowledge of life's ugly side, she must hold the highest standard of
purity before her son, knowing, as she knew, that far back at her life's
beginning, were those few hideous weeks that, in the eyes of the world,
could utterly undo the work of twenty strong and steadfast years! She
must be silent when she longed to cry aloud, she must train herself to
cry aloud at the thing that she had been. And she must silently endure
the terrible fact that her husband knew, and that he would never forget.
Pages:
623
624
625
626
627
628
629
630
631
632
633
634
635
636
637
638
639
640
641
642
643
644
645
646
647